I'm not talking about boobies from outerspace-although I notice a heavy alien theme has taken over this website since I've been away.  (That and a uber hot female/hooker who thinks we will get along fabulously.  You know because she probably messaged you too.

I'm also not talking about the politician boobies who can't seem to keep it in their pants-although it might make for an interesting blog as well.  

No, I'm back to talking about breastfeeding the biscuit.  One year has been my goal-and I'm close to achieving it.  I survived the appearance of six sharp teeth-and three week period of time where Chedda found biting my nipple to be HIL-A-RIOUS.  Seriously, he'd look at me and giggle sinisterly while making chomping motions at my nips.  I was a little concerned that I might be raising some type of Hannibal Lector baby.

Once he learned that those little fingers belonged to him, we were faced with a new dilemna.  Chedda would suck a little bit-and then leaning back, smile and use his finger to push my nipple in as far as it would go.  Sometimes he'd take his little chubby baby hands and just flick it to see what would happen.  I'd try to admonish him-but then he'd do it again and wiggle his eyebrows at me.  I'd immediately lose all parental authority and begin giggling-which of course made him more determined to do it.

Over the last few months, Chedda has become adept at crawling, sitting up and standing up.  So now I've become a jungle gym with milk ducts.  A typical feeding session starts with a calm baby pulling a good 3-4 sips.  Then he sits up and tries to get to the other boob.  If he had his way, he would alternate between boobs (perhaps one is chocolate-the other regular?) He'd also spend his feeding time sticking his hand in my mouth or up my nose, standing up, sitting up and then flipping himself upside down.  In between these gymnastic moves, he'd stop by for a quick sip from the left or right boobie tap.  I should probably just call Cirque du Soleil now.  

The other day, he came in for a drink, took a long pull, and threw his head back with a hearty baby, "YEEEEEEEAAAAH!"  No lie.