Ok leave it to me to have another puke story (if you haven't, read the blog of when I threw up in a man purse), however, this time I wasn't the one who got sick. Haha.
But first...you may have noticed the 4 polls I posted on this site. Yup, Halloween time is comming and I have no idea what I want to be! You are never too old to dress up! So I posted the 4 polls and the winner of each poll will face off in a final poll and I will seriously dress up as the ultimate winner. So help me decide!!! It will be fun :)
GROSS STORY ALERT!!!!
Ok, now to the puke story. So, I have a friend named Desa who has been a pal for 8 years or so, and we have similar work schedules so we frequently go out to lunch together. Well, last year we went to a Chinese buffet near nothtown mall. While I was eating I looked up and noticed she was gone. Because she is a smoker, I assumed she just went out to do so. However, she came back a few minutes later covered in vomit in the front and in the back she was soaked! She said she was choking, so she ran to the bathroom and threw up on the floor by accident. Then she slipped in it and fell in the toilet. Yuck! We had to go buy her a new outfit at the Goodwill next door (which is now closed...sad!). Well, anyways, that was last year.
2 days ago, we decided to eat at the buffet again. We hadn't been there since the incident. This time we came and the food was delicious and we were joking and laughing about the last time we were there. Then Desa said to me "Have you ever had these crab things wrapped in bacon?" And well, since Im allergic to both crab and pork, I said no. So she took a big bite and then clutched her throat and started thrusting. I thought she was re-enacting the last visit, so I laughed a little. But then she ran towards the bathroom. Now, to get to the bathroom you need to walk through the buffet area. Well, she didn't make it that far. She covered her mouth but it didn't help any....vomited was spewing everywhere. On the floor, in the salad bar, on the walls, EVERYWHERE. They had to (obviously) close that section of the buffet and clean it out. YUCK. I lost my appetite right then and there. Yet, Desa STILL continued to eat! (This time we had to get her a new shirt at Target...) Yup. Never goin' back there again...
So, I'm convinced I am a true blonde airhead. Last night I spent the night at my parents house. So this morning I got up for work and when I was almost ready to go I started up my car to warm it up (it was a chilly morning). I was going to do my hair as it warmed up. Anyways, I locked my keys in my car. I thought, hmmm no big deal, luckily I'm at my parents house and they have a spare. Well, I went to the key hook and it was gone. Then it dawned on me that last night my mom needed to move my car. So I woke up my parents and they were a little irritated at being woken up at 5:30 am (and rightfully so). So, we all started searching and no luck. I was freaking out! Then I realized...oh, my brother has a spare!!! So I woke him up and he couldn't find his keys! Well...coincidentially he had locked HIS keys in his car as well (the difference was my car was turned on!!!). And...yup...his spare was missing as well. So all 4 of us were in a giant panic scrambling all over the place on a mad key hunt. Meanwhile my mother decided to scream at me at how stupid I am to lock the keys int he car while it was running (even though she did the same thing last year). Thank goodness my dad found my spare.....in my moms shoe. What the heck! I rushed out of the house to get to work while my brother looked for his spare. So, barely on time I ran into work and slammed smack dab into a heater, whacking my hand really hard on the corner. Now I have this really icky bruise and it smarts! Then I spilled my can of RED moutain dew (it was all I had time to grab as I hurried out the door) all over my white polo, and dropped my oatmeal all over the floor. Yeah...I truly am a clutz and a ditz. But hey...we make the world go round!!!
My day is (so far so good) getting better. Yeah, its not even 10:30 yet but Im keeping my fingers crossed! After a morning like that I figure it can only go up from here!
Oh...earlier this week I was a guest on Saturday Evening Cocktails with Dan Hendrickson. It will be posted close to Halloween. I am really excited, it was a whole lot of fun!! Dan is quite a funny guy, granted it takes me 5 minutes to understand his jokes but its just that Im really slow and ditzy like that. But it was the Halloween sssccarrryyy edition and because I love Halloween so much it was extra fun!
Ok..thats all the thoughts I have for now...other than the fact that I am REALLY hungry (sad...my oatmeal disaster meant no breakfast). So I can't WAIT for lunch time.
As a lot of you know, I have been an avid fan of Big Brother since season 1! I even watch the UK and Australian versions! Anyways, my favourite contestant of ALL TIME is hands down Dustin. And because of the WONDERFUL-NESS of this fabulous website and the kindness of cadybeth, I learned that Dustin was in town!
Well, lets just say I was all nervous as all heck. Yes, I've met celebrities before (I even called Ryan Seacrest a drama queen...to his face!) but Dustin was different. I mean, I watched him 3 times a week for 10 weeks or so, so you really get to know these people as the summer goes by! I liked Dustin since even before the episode because I read his bio online and he seemed really cool and by the end of episode 1 he was my favourite! So when I heard hhe was in town I was going nuts (I hope I don't seem stalker-ish I was just excited!).
So, when I drove to Chammps to meet him I didn't know what to expect. I didn't know if it was a meet n' greet, a party, or what. Well, when I arrived I was shaking and clutching my camera and asked the hostess: "is Dustin from Big Brother here?" and she said "yes, are you a part of his party?" and I told her about the post and such, and she said "let me check on it!" and when she came back she said "Ok, yeah go back there, dustins waiting!"
So...as I walk towards the back of the resteraunt, there he was, standing on the stairs, hand outstretched. I couldn't believe it! It was actually Dustin! hahaha. I know its silly but yeah! And then we talked for like 15-20 mins about the show, about him and how he grew up in Minnesota, etc. See, he was at a FAMILY thing at chammps, but is always excited to meet fans. He said its weird meeting fans because he said he is just a normal person so its still strange to be recognized (keep in mind his season just ended less than 2 weeks ago). I kept saying "I hope Im not being a bother!" I mean there was no line up of fans or anyhting, I just didnt want to keep him from his family. But yeah, he introduced me to his brother, sister, and other family members. He was real, down to earth, and wasnt afraid to vent about the jerks in the big brother house (DANIELE!!! he said "Jen really was that selfish, Dick reall was an a-hole, Amber cried just as much if not more, and Daniele really is a nasty b***h!" He also told me some interesting behind-the-scenes things about the show and said he is excited about his trip to barbados that he won!!!
I also said goodbye before I left and well, lets just say it was really an awesome experience. I stopped being nervous almost instantly because he was so fun and down to earth, just like he was on the show! It was amazing, thanks again Cadybeth!!!!
Ok, its Thursday! Which is a hop, skimp, and a jump to the weekend, so thats a-ok with me! Ok, as I sit here listening to Taylor Swift's new song "Out Song" (which is brilliant, by the way) I will start my "Thursday Thoughts" with a BIG Fashion No No!
Ok...so...I've had these thoughts for a LONG TIME about Crocs. I've kept them to myself for the most part but I just can't contain my feelings anymore. CROCS ARE THE MOST WRETCHED, UGLIEST INVENTION IN HISTORY. When I first saw them ages ago at the mall I was like "ew...who would wear those?" and soon they started popping up on little girl's feet everywhere. I was thinking HMM I hope this is a short fad. But then little boys started wearing them too! Then I nearly choked on a pop tart when I saw an ADULT woman at work wearing them. Now MEN are joining in. I'm really sorry, I hope I'm not offending people....but HONESTLY, whats so cute about them? They don't match ANY outfit, are clunky, and I ALWAYS see people twisting their ankles and getting hurt in them. Plus, I heard on the news the other day that some kid got his croc stuck on an escalator and it RIPPED HIS TOE OFF! Jeez...now if that isn't a sign to dispose of crocs immediately, I don't know what is. Whats worse are the new designs! A little girl at work had "fancy crocs" for a school program. It was a croc that was modified to look like a dressy shoe. Honestly, if you are going to wear a fancy dress up shoe for a nice event, get the REAL THING, not a DISGUSTING croc disguised as something nice. It would be Richard Simmons in a hairnet...you can attempt to cover up the ugly but its STILL THERE.
On a happier note...today I realized something kind of swell. So, heres the back story. I get paid tomorrow, and I only have only 5 dollars left until then. (Sad, I know, but hey Im 21! Having 5 dollars left is practically a miracle, I think Im the only 21 year old I know who doesnt have any credit card debt or hasnt bounced a check). So, on my way to work I passed McDonalds and saw a lady sitting outside eating a srumptious looking hot cake. And, let me get this straight, I only go to McDonalds twice a year or so (minus the few random times where i crave a McFlurry), so I'm not really aware of their options. So I was at work talking to my coworker Andrea, and I said "I'm so hungry, I want McDonalds breakfast but I only have 5 bucks". And she said "ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You could get tons of stuff with that!". I honestly had forgotten how cheap fast food can be, if I go out to eat its usually at a sit-down place with friends or take-out chinese (mmm sweet and sour chicken and cream cheese wantons...I know what I'm gonna do first on pay day) so yeah...the low low prices kind of floored me! I had a DELUXE breakfast (3 pancakes, a sausage thing, eggs, and a buscuit) for like $3.89 or something. I still had OVER a dollar to spare! What an amazing start to the morning! And on my way home I got to listen to Kevyn and Jim Gaf***an laugh about hot pockets. Heh heh.
So, romantic comedies are pretty much the best anti-depression remedy ever. I've had a LOT of stuff happen to me in the past couple months (car accidents, family problems, and apartment floodings, OH MY!) but even though I am single and should be sad watching these alone, romantic comedies make me feel all cozy and warm and happy, even though I have nobody to share it with. I've spent so many days lately just relaxing, curled up in a nice fuzzy blanket and a cup of creamy hot chcolate watching predictable impossible sweet-as-heck romances float before my eyes. Don't get me wrong, I love those qualities. I LIKE knowing that in the end everything will be all right and everyone will be happy and in love. That way I don't get so gloomy during the sad parts, because I always no SOME way SOME how some crazy thing will bring the two together and everything will be just peachy. As much as I wish those things could happen to me, I know it won't and I'm ok with that. I mean...I don't think I'd like to meet someone at the top of the empire state building anyways. I've been up there and its too cold and windy, I'd much rather meet the love of my life someplace warm and cozy like a ski lodge by a nice crackling fire instead. I really want to make a group on this site about romantic comedies, but there is no "movie" section! So I don't know where to make it. Any suggestions?
Alright, next topic. This ones a gross one. So, a little less than 2 weeks ago I came home at about midnight and as I opened the door I was greeted by stepping into about 3 inces of water. The pipes backed up into our apartment and flooded the kitchen and half of the living room. I spent over 2 hours trying to mop it all up (and I got pretty wet in the process too). Not only that, but it backed up other people's water into our apartment so I was cleaning up meatballs and noodles of strangers. The next day I spent several hours cleaning the crap hole of a mess that my roomate left (me and my roomate are like the odd couple...I'm very clean and shes lazy and refuses to clean up any mess she makes) so that when the people came to clean our carpet they wouldn't want to vomit from the mess. Well, my roomate kind of sat and watched me and when I asked her to help she said she had to leave for work soon. Well, she continued to watch TV for 30 minuites as I cleaned up her countless wrappers and she still refused to help. So, when I turned on the vaccum cleaner to vaccum up the bowl of ceral she had spilled a week before and didn't clean up, she turned up the volume on the TV so she could hear. See, I kind of take refuge in my room so I avoid the gross-ness of the living room. When I first moved in I would clean up her messes, but then I got sick of it because she kind of just expected ME to do it all. Anyways, then she got up to leave for work and realized her watch was an hour fast. So she went back into her room to sleep, and when I said "hey, this is your mess I'm cleaning" she said thank you and shut the door. In the word of the wise old Charlie Brown: UGHHHHH! Ok, well, its a little over a week later and our carpet is clean but it still stinks and now these icky nats have invaded our apartment and are swarming anywhere there is water (kitchen and bathroom). It is SOOO gross, I hung up fly paper and caught HUNDREDS of the pests and they still abound. I know this is gross, but I am running out of ideas and I don't know what to do!!! Any suggestions??
OCTOBER IS ALMOST HERE! Hurray! Halloween is my second-favourite holiday in the history of holidays. (Christmas of course trumps all). Well, I get really festive as soon as october 1st hits. I've already gathered a pile of movies to watch for as soon as the month changes. I have a bunch of horror movies (Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street, Saw, Children Of The Corn, House On Haunted Hill, etc) but I also have a bunch of kid's movies and comedy specials as well (Mad Monster Party...who remembers this??? Its a Rankin Bass movie, you know, the makers or Rudolph??) I also have this random DVD where it is a haunted house and you click on random items to see vintage horror show features and shorts from the 1920s-1970's. It even has a virtual tour through an old carnival spook house! The DVD is called "Monsters Crash The Pajama Party" in case anyone is interested. Some things you click on are really random like a man in a monkey soon doing strange hand motions at the camera or dancing halloween masks. Also, I can't wait to gather some friends up (but this year nobody really wants to do this which makes me sad because they said its too scary) and do some haunted hayrides and haunted houses and stuff. Yes, Im 21 but I still have a blast at these. Valley Scare is amazing, Trail Of Terror scares the crap out of me which is fun, Nightmare at Pinehaven Farm is a tradition, and Fright Farm is a great low-cost fun scare. I'm going to try other ones this year as well. However, last year at Trail Of Terror an obese clown was chasing me around honking a horn at my butt saying "Do I make you horny?". I'm not even kidding. My friends thought it was hilarious, but I tohught it was gross! I mean, I can laugh now, but at the time my skin was crawling because it was so perverted. Oh, and on Halloween itself I will probably go to the Gay 90's like I did last year. It was pretty fun, everyone is all in costume (well, people are usually dressed up in silly outfits there anyways, but Halloween even moreso!)
Ohh Scarlett Johanson is on TV! Isn't she gorgeous? I think she is the best actress out there these days. She reminds me of the glamourous beauties who graced the silver screen in the 1930's and 1940's. If you haven't seen the movie "A Good Woman" with Scarlett and Helen Hunt, it is a MUST see. Stellar performances by both gals. I don't know, I just think Scarlett is classy with fabulous fashion sense and I appreciate her views about life and such. She has strong opinions and it is admirable how she sticks with her thoughts even though some people strongly disagress with her.
Ok, so my mom said she accidenly misplaced my autographs of Judy Garland, Mickey Rooney, and Jane Wyman (who recently passes away, RIP). And these aren't reproductions, they are GENUINE on the level autographs. I kept them in my old room (they were the only thing left in my old room on top of the hutch, the only furniture left in it). I kept them there because they are my prized belongings and I felt safer keeping them there than at my apartment (I can be pretty paranoid). Well, my mom said she moved them so she could dust and can't remember where she put them. And now I am so sad and hope she can find them.
Alright...if you stayed with me and read my rambling at this point, I must say thank you, how did you manage to get this far without getting annoyed with my random tangents??? I was just kind of in a talkative mood (granted I never shut up anyhow), and because I had nobody here to talk I figured, hey, I shall blog!
So thanks for reading and have a SWELL day and a lovely weekend!!!!
Call me crazy but I love the rain. For some reason rain always lightens my spirits, and really, I'm not a morbid person...I dunno ever since I was little I've loved rainy weather!
Except when I drive in it...then I HATE it...
But its raining now, and because it was hard to see I stopped at my parents house (where I am now) on my way home from work to eat my take out chinese food until it lets up a bit outside.
But I CAN'T WAIT to get home so I can enjoy it. I love the smell of rain (yes, it does have a smell, I swear!), I love listening to the thunder clap while I am laying in my bed, the pop-corn jiffy pop sound of the rain, cuddling under blankets with tea or hot chocolate watching corny romantic comedies (OR Singin In The Rain), and even dancing and singing in the rain itself! I met one of my best friends over a year ago when I was dancing in the rain. She was in a Caribou Coffee and she was waving as I was swinging around a lightpole in the downpour. She came out and introduced herself and danced with me and VOILA! Instant friendship. Yeah, dancing in the rain is a little weird but hey I can admit I'm an odd person! I say my weirdness makes me unique! haha
So...since I'm stranded with nothing else to do I thought...gee, this rain is swell...and figured it was oh-so-grand enough to blog about.
I'm singing in the rain Just singing in the rain What a glorious feelin' I'm happy again I'm laughing at clouds So dark up above The sun's in my heart And I'm ready for love Let the stormy clouds chase Everyone from the place Come on with the rain I've a smile on my face I walk down the lane With a happy refrain Just singin', Singin' in the rain
Dancin' in the rain Dee-ah dee-ah dee-ah Dee-ah dee-ah dee-ah I'm happy again! I'm singin' and dancin' in the rain!
Ok... not my finest moment... but it's true. But the night didn't really start out that bad! So Thursday night I was all settled down cozy and comfy cuddling by myself under a blanket watching "Beach Party" (yes, the 1960's one starring Annette and Frankie!) when I get one of those calls. No, not a booty call, but one of those calls you get when you are all ready for bed but your friend INSISTS that you get dressed and go out on a night on the town. I usually would have said no (considering I worked at 6 am the next day) but it was my friend Lucie who is visiting here from the United Kingdom only until October 4th. So therefore, I felt obligated to go out.
So, I get all dolled out in my brand new expensive shirt and free amazing jeans (see one of my previous blogs about that story) and was all set to go. So Lucie comes over and I take a few "starter shots" before we go (Drinks are expensive at the club!). Now, let me get something straight. I am NOT a big partier. I only drink heavily once in a blue moon, so don't think I'm some crazy drunk! :) And because I was all ready for bed, I needed a couple shots to wake me up and get me in the clubbing mood.
So, the three of us pile in the car (Afton, Lucie, and I...Afton drove of course, she was the designated driver...DRIVING DUNK IS A NO NO!) and I was already in the beginning stages of drunkedness at this point (I had no dinner and am 132 pounds, so it doesn't take much). So we get to the Gay 90's (Lucie has never been there and I told her that Thursadays are REALLY slow and that 2 of the dance floors are closed but she still really wanted to go) and we dance in the only open dance floor, the hip-hop room. I know I am not a good dancer, even though my friends claim I am good, I just kind of move and do whatever. But I especially am not familiar with dancing hip-hop! So, I start getting in a groovin' mood and this really funny 55 year old african american woman with big poofy hair (who introduced herself as Ruthie) started grinding on me and it was hilarious. She was amazingly funny and friendly and was a great dancer! She told me "boy, you know how to drop it like its hot!" which made Lucie laugh hysterically. Her accent got everyone's attention and she was basically mobbed with everyone wondering "who is this British person?"
We watched the talent show a bit and danced some more, and I had to yell at a dirty old 70 year old man with wandering eyes in the bathroom (jeez, just let me pee in peace!) and then we decided to go. This was a malibu pineapple later, and I was well...drunk as heck. Like I said, I'm rarely drunk, so hey, whatever right? Lucie said I was hilarious, belting out Patsy Cline, Tammy Wynette, Judy Garland, and Lena Horne songs.
Just a warning, after this paragraph is when the "vomiting" part happens...so if you have a weak stomach, pass the next part!
This is when things start getting gross. So, we hop in the car, and Afton is confused at how to get home with the bridge out. And I am far to drunk to even comprehend how to tell her to get home, so shes driving all over the place hunting for a detour, and the twists and turns were not making me feel so well. Lucie said "are you ok babe?" and I replied "Oh yeah! Don't worry, I feel swell!" Less than a minute later I was frantically dumping out the contents of my "man purse" messanger bag and vomiting in it heave after heave. Gross right? But it happens to the best of us...luckily it wasn't chunky or anything, just liquid (sorry...Im a too much info kinda guy). Well, it gets worse. The vomit leaked through the purse and onto my lap which leaked through my lovely new jeans and underwear on to my legs. The alcohol was burning my skin and I was also freezing because Lucie has the windows open. So I am shivering and whining because of the burning feeling on my legs. So Lucie says, "Babe, just take off your pants." So I peel off my soaked pants and sit there shivering but this time burn-free. Then, Afton turns into a Perkins and says "Im hungry". I explain that Im drunk, pants-less, purse-less, and covered in alchy-vomit. They laugh and drive me to my apartment. This part I don't really remember but was told the next day that I walked out of the car WITHOUT my pants (and my underwear apparantly was stuck to my pants so I was literally bottomless). Like I said, this part I don't really remember, thank GOODNESS nobody saw me...I wasn't trying to be a naked pervert, I was just cold and drunk and wanted to sleep! So Afton assisted me to my bed, set my alarm, and 3 hours later I woke up (sober but sick) and on my way to work. Luckily my pounding headache only lasted 2 hours or so!
So now, I need to go out today and buy a new man purse. Lovely, huh? Ok, so I know that was a really twisted and gross story (PLEASE don't think less of me, I swear Im a normal guy!) but I couldn't help but to tell the story because frankly, looking back on it makes me laugh. And Afton and Lucie will NEVER let me forget it, I'm sure.
So...anyone know of any places selling cheap messanger bags? Ha!
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