First, let me say, I hope SOMEDAY I'll post a happy sappy blog, but today is not that day.

Second, thank you my friends in Gabster-land for your thoughts, prayers, virtual hugs, and even the flowers you showered on me today. I am indeed blessed. The story goes like this:

This morning I got a phone call from my father. "There's been a development this morning with your mother." As I have shared before, my mother is suffering from an untreated mental illness. What most people would consider extremely bizarre behavior has sadly become normal to my family. But a development... that raises an eyebrow.

"Your mother woke up and said she didn't feel right and that she thinks someone has put her back on her anti-psych meds (God, I wish!). She wants to go see a doctor." Now THAT is a DEVELOPMENT.  Dad suggests that the wife of a friend of his come over to the house and do an eval or consult. When Mom finds out who the friend is, she declines. He suggests that she call the hospital in Wausau, she doesn't think she can make it that far. She finally decides to put a call into the Behavioral Health center and try to get in to see her old psychiatrist. 

Ok, a pause for some sarcasm... OK, she hasn't been under anyone treatment for almost 4 years AND she terminated that care when she decided the dr was out to get her. What makes her think that the psychiatrist's office is a walk-in clinic?  (Here's where I sent out a call for prayers and support.)

Behavioral Health tells her that because she is not a current patient, she needs a referal from a GP. Problem is, she hasn't had a GP in over 4 years because she doesn't trust anyone... they are all out to get her. So she makes an appointment with a Nurse Practitioner (someone I will refer to as Dr now... it's just easier). Dad calls and tells me who the appt is with and when. He also informs me that mom told the receptionist that she believes she was drugged last night. Can I try and reach the "Dr" and let her know our concerns and mom's mental health history.... he's afraid they might think that he drugged her if he calls.

I call and get the same receptionist. So far, so good. I explain the problem to the receptionist. She is sympathetic and tries to connect me to the "Dr's" nurse. I'm on hold for about 10 minutes. I don't care. If I manage to talk to the nurse, I stand a chance of getting the "Dr" to look for more. The receptionist finally comes back on the line apologetic and says the nurse will call me as soon as she can. 

So I wait. I don't wait well. I'm afraid to leave my desk for fear that the nurse will call while I'm away and I'll miss my chance. An hour or more later she calls and in a gush I try to explain everything thats happened, all of our fears, and hopes, for my mother today. I had about 4 minutes before she had to go, promising she'd call me back.

I sat at my desk for another 2 hours before the phone rang again. It's the nurse and I apologize for what surely sounded like desperation from a concerned daughter. She calms me and asks questions about my mothers history. She has pulled the clinic's files for the past 3 years and asks me about the episode from last September. I answer her questions succinctly, knowing that her time is very limited. Before she has to go, I ask her to try and find a way for my dad to sit in on the appt, so that we have some sane ears present to know what really was said. She said she would see to it and I thank her again.

Now I sit and wait. Dad finally calls. "Dr" asked all the right questions and Mom surprisingly answered most of them. She admitted her past psychiatric episodes, admitted to having hallucinations... in the past. When she was asked about the voices in her head, she denied it. When she was asked about talking to people that weren't there, she again denied it. Finally, my dad speaks up. He tells the "Dr" that she listens and talks to the voices in her head all the time, on a daily almost hourly basis. Mom shoots him the old evil, hoping she can silence him with a look. That doesn't work, so in that nasty tone we've come to know, she tells Dad "Leave it alone Jim". "Dr" makes notes.  The rest of the "exam" continues without incident. The "Dr" tells Mom that she wants to rule out any organic possibilities before referring her for psychiatric care. She orders a full blood workup to rule out drugging and a brain scan.

Dad escaped for a cig and called me while they were doing the bloodwork. He didn't know if the brain scan would be today or tomorrow and I haven't heard from either of them since, but tonight that's ok. I filled in my sister-in-law so she could relay it to my deer-slaying brother out in the field.

After talking to Dad I was nearly giddy. It's a first step. It's a lifeline. It's an answered prayer.  Thank you.